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Directed by J.R. Stuart

Auditions  for this Kaufman and Hart’s 1936 comedy will be held on

  • Sunday, September 14, 2014 from
  • 7-10 p.m. at the Theatre. 
  • Please be prepared to recite a one minute monologue of your choice. 
  • You will also be asked to read from the script.
  •  The cast consists of seven women and twelve men – ages  18 to 60+.

 Rehearsals will take place approximately 3 times a week until late October.  

Performances are November 7-9, 13-15.

The Characters:

 Penelope “Penny” Sycamore 
Preferred age: 40 and up
Usually goes by Penny, Penelope is the mother of Essie and Alice, wife of Paul, and daughter of Martin. She writes plays and paints as hobbies because it makes her happy, but is terrible at both. Penny is a loving mother and wife and is constantly concerned with the welfare of her family. Her main goal is to make sure everyone is happy, particularly her daughter Alice.

 Martin “Grandpa” Vanderhof 
Preferred age: 60 and up
Referred to mostly as Grandpa in the play. Father-in-law to Paul, father of Penny, grandfather of Alice and Essie. He is an eccentric happy old man who has never paid his income tax because he doesn’t believe in it, as he feels that the government wouldn’t know what to do with the money if he paid for it. He lives his life by the philosophy: “Don’t do anything that you’re not going to enjoy doing.” He goes to circuses, commencements, throws darts, and collects stamps. 

 Alice Sycamore 
Preferred age: 18 and up
Fiancé of Tony Kirby, daughter of Paul and Penny, Granddaughter of Martin, sister of Essie. She the only “normal” family member. She has an office job, and is rather embarrassed by the eccentricities of her family when she has Tony and his parents at her house, yet she still loves them. 

 Tony Kirby 
Preferred age: 18 and up
Fiancé of Alice, Son of Mr. and Mrs. Kirby. He sees how, even though the Sycamores appear odd, they are really the perfect family because they love and care about each other. His own family is very proper and has many issues none of them will admit. He is vice president of Kirby and Co. 

 Anthony W. Kirby
Preferred age: 45 and up
Husband of Mrs. Kirby, father of Tony. He is a very proper man who is president of Kirby and Co. and secretly despises his job. His hobby is raising expensive orchids. He is also a member of the Harvard Society, the Union Club, the National Geographic Society, and the Racquet Club. 

 Essie Carmichael 
Preferred age: 25 and up
Wife of Ed, daughter of Penny and Paul Sycamore, Granddaughter of Martin, sister of Alice. She is childish. As a hobby she makes candy that Ed sells. Essie dreams of being a ballerina. She has spent 8 years studying with Boris Kolenkhov, but is a terrible dancer. 

 Boris Kolenkhov 
Preferred age: 30 and up
A Russian who escaped to America shortly before the Russian Revolution. He is very concerned with world politics, and the deterioration of Russia. He is the ballet instructor of Essie, aware that she is untalented at dancing, but knows that she enjoys dancing so he keeps working with her.

 Paul Sycamore 
Preferred age: 40 and up
Father of Essie and Alice, husband of Penny, Son-in-law of Martin. He is a Tinker who manufactures fireworks in the basement with the help of his assistant Mr. De Pinna. His hobby is playing with erector sets. 

 Ed Carmichael 
Preferred age: 25 and up
Husband of Essie, son-in-law of Paul and Penny. He is a xylophone player, and distributes Essie’s candies. Ed is an amateur printer who prints anything that sounds good to him. 

 Mr. De Pinna 
Preferred age: 30 and up
The iceman who came inside to speak to Paul five years before, and never left. He helps Mr. Sycamore build fireworks, and moonlights as a model in Mrs. Sycamore’s paintings.

Preferred age: 25 and up
The boyfriend of Rheba, who seems to serve as volunteer handyman for the Sycamores. In the words of Mrs. Sycamore, “The two of them are really cute together, something like Porgy and Bess.” The characters of Donald and Rheba, are African-American.

Preferred age: 25 and up
The maid and cook to the Sycamore family. She is dating Donald. She is onstage a lot, but doesn’t necessarily say anything. 

 Wilbur C. Henderson 
Preferred age: 25 and up
An employee of the IRS. He comes to collect the tax money owed by Grandpa, and can’t understand why the latter won’t pay income tax.

 Miriam Kirby 
Preferred age: 45 and up
Wife of Mr. Kirby, mother of Tony. She is an extremely prim and proper woman and is horrified by the goings-on in the Sycamore household. Her hobby is spiritualism. 

 The Grand Duchess Olga Katrina 
Preferred age: 40 and up
She was one of the Grand Duchesses of Russia before the Revolution, another being her sister, the Grand Duchess Natasha. Since then she has been forced to flee to America where she has found work as a waitress in Childs Restaurant. The rest of her family has had a similar fate, such as her Uncle Sergei, the Grand Duke, who is now an elevator man. She loves to cook as a hobby.  Russian accent is desired.

 Gay Wellington (May be doubled with The Grand Duchess Olga Katrina)
Preferred age: 25 and up
An actress whom Mrs. Sycamore meets on a bus and invites home to read one of her plays. She is an alcoholic, gets very drunk and passes out shortly after arriving at the Sycamore’s home. 


G-Man 1 “The Man”, G-Man 2 “Jim”, G-Man 3 “Mac” 
Preferred age: 21 and up 
Three agents who come to investigate Ed because of the communist things he prints up, such as “God is the State – the State is God”. 

J.R. Stuart

502.380.6569 (cell)


Special Auditions

for the role of Laura Hunt.

Saturday, Sept. 20th at 4:00 p.m.

These auditions are so early because a portrait of Laura will need to be painted.  This will give the artist ample time to complete the portrait.

Needed is one woman, age 25-35.  Please bring a headshot (a 4 X 6 photo works) and resume.  Please prepare a one-minute dramatic monologue (preferably not from the show and NO Shakespeare).  There will also be cold readings from the script.

Productions dates:  March 13-21, 2015













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